Today’s first matter was art history as usual, and I’ve finished up Prehistory. Now, we move onto the wonderful world of earth after written language, when we know the names of stuff. It is the time… for the Near East! Or is it the Middle East? It’s interchangeable as far as I’m aware. Anyway, that’s the area where a lot of civilizations really got started, including the Egyptians, Babylonians, Sumerians, etc.
Next up, Oceanography. I got 3 more things done today, mostly focusing on fishing, and how a lot of fisheries can be poorly managed, leading to a lower yield than there should be. It is rather encouraging to find out that there are a lot of places which have a minimum size limit, so that fish can get big enough to be profitable.
Lastly, more Monkey. Today’s chapters can be summarized as follows;
The immortals enter the dark temple, and Monkey, Pigsy, and Sandy pretend to be three gods of Taoism, and the immortals ask for immortality elixir.
Since the three of them don’t have any of that, they piss in urns and give it to the immortals to drink. Upon drinking, one of the immortals proclaims that it tastes like pig urine.
One has to wonder how he knows what that tastes like.
Anyway, they get found out, and Monkey, Pigsy, and Sandy flee back to Tripitaka, telling him nothing of what they did. The next day, they go to the palace to get passports, and the immortals proclaim that they’re the ones that have been causing a bunch of trouble around the place. Of course, they are right, but Monkey and the crew never admit it. Things happen, and the immortals end up challenging the group to see which religion in superior.
The trials begin, and Monkey cheats like there is no tomorrow! Of course, the immortals try to cheat too, although monkey continuously foils them. Eventually, they get fed up with how the group continuously beats them, and challenge them to see who is more immortal. One proclaims that he can chop off his head and call it back to him, one proclaims that he cut his stomach open, clean his intestines, and put himself back together, while the last claims that he can rest in a vat of boiling oil.
Monkey beats them at their own game each time. The chopped head immortal binds monkey’s head in place after it is chopped off, so monkey grows a new head. When the immortal tries it, monkey turns one of his hairs into a dog, and has it run off with the immortal’s head. The immortal soon dies, because his head is chopped off.
The gut cutting immortal doesn’t cheat, and monkey is just fine. When the gut cutter does it, monkey has a crow swoop down and tear out the intestines. The immortal dies.
The boiling oil guy doesn’t mess with monkey, and monkey comes out fine. He does, however, cheat when it’s his turn, by having an ice dragon curl up in the vat of oil so that it’s cold instead of boiling hot. Monkey gets rid of the ice dragon, and the immortal boils to death.
That takes care of those pesky Taoists, I suppose.